Adventures in Internal Monologues...

Me: Unggghhg. What time is it?

Also Me: It's 7:30 a.m.

Me: Unggghhg. .... What day is it?

Also Me: It's Saturday.

Me: So why am I awake?

Also Me: I'd guess it's either a result of the sun streaming in your window, or a cat breathing in your face.

Me: Mmmmm, the bed's still cozy. Let's roll over and go back to sleep.

Also Me: Too late. You've let this dialogue continue for too long, and now I'm awake. Let's get up and scrub the bathroom!!!

Me: Who ARE you?? This is not some crazy 'clean-the-bathroom-at-the-break-of-day' holiday. It's Saturday you addle-brained nincompoop.

Also Me: Haven't years of experience taught you that name calling isn't going to work? All you've managed to do is irritate yourself and now you're awake too. Let's go make some baklava.

Me: No. I don't care what you say. I'm rolling over, snuggling under the blankets and staying in bed whether I'm sleeping or not!

Also Me: You can't. Now you have to pee too.

Me: Cheater.